I found the solution!!!!!!!!!!!
the problem isn't ffmpeg, the problem was UberUploader when it is used on light speed servers. some light speed servers cause UU to make errors uploading files (if you have problems getting the progress bar to load or if the upload isn't smooth i.e. the numbers jump up and down or the progress bar moves back and forth durring download) the errors are small but they are enough to get ffmpeg to kick out the conversion. that's why the errors very in type. if you are experiencing this type of problem I strongly suggest you get your host to move your website to an Apache server. It solved all my problems. UU knows about the conflict with light speed they have a few suggestions on how to solve the issue but they didn't work in my case and phpmotion runs so much better on Apache that in my opinion it's really just better to change servers.
